4/14/2006
Slow Adjustment
American Soldier says,
Adjusting has been interesting for me. I am still very ‘on edge’ when I get in crowded areas. I typically avoid a crowded room altogether. Being in a vehicle is still the same. I am constantly scanning, no because I want to but my mind is still sort of geared for that routine. Drives are quiet most times. I just get in this zone and really don’t like it. I find myself in a stare at random times. My mind just goes into thoughts of being in sector or certain events that transpired.
I’m going to be setting up an appointment with a counselor I use to see. I made contact with him yesterday so I am happy that I can seek some sort of retreat with him.
I got to see a few guys I was stationed with this past week. They are from my state so opportunities arose and seeing them did me some good. I will say that being around my fellow brothers in arms is very therapeutic.
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32 Responses to “Slow Adjustment”
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Right on, friend. Gotta get a hobby to help keep your mind busy. Or you can do the army fix-all: More pushups.
You know what is really theraputic… is hunting. Nothing like sitting quietly in the middle of the woods in the wee hours of the morning. If you want to find God, it’ll be out hunting… or in a foxhole.
Glad to hear you are seeking help… It is sad to hear the different things that our men and women go though when they get back, war can really mess some people up.
Stay strong, and and all will work out. Thank you again for your service and your families sacrifice.
Good job, A.S. I’m glad and proud that you are seeking help sooner, rather than later. Very, very, very extremely wise move.
As I’ve said a trillion times before (you sick of hearing this yet?!) Hang in there — keep pressign forward, one minute at a time. We’re all standing with you and holding you up in prayer.
man I just found your blog and it’s blowing my mind.
You might benefit greatly from checking out EMDR therapy. I am a former USMC Mustang, and my father-in-law, a retired USA colonel and psychotherapist introduced me to it. Trauma, stress, post traumatic stress, even sports performance, have been greatly addressed using this therapy. Dr. Francine Shapiro developed it, it has been used thoroughly from engineers of trains who deal with hitting suicides, to military veterans. His site is www.askdrdavidnow.com or you can google/yahoo EMDR. It works. Good luck and God Bless
It relieves me so to know you “know” enough to get some outside assistance. Personally, I don’t know how one adjusts going from combat to domestic circumstances and can see it would be difficult to make that adjustment and admit to needing some guidance. I wouldn’t find it easy but it’s the right thing to do. AS - you’re one of the good guys.
I can’t imagine what it must be like for you and your family as you all go through this together. Know that you have a lot of prayer support out here for you ….glad you’re seeking help—
Checking in and so glad to see your post! Proud of you both ~
AS,
I’m sorry that you’re going through all of this but thank you from the bottom of my heart for serving our country!
I am praying for you and for your family. You guys are very special to us!
Hope the counselor will help you to feel better soon!!
I am glad that you are finding some relief. I hope you can adjust to being back home well. I know it is always good to see friends that have been through things with you. Glad to see you are doing better and are looking to get even better.
I’m glad you are seeking help and spending time with your friends. Keeping you and your family in my prayers.
***THANK YOU*** for your service to our country!
It is because of the things you and others like you
have done that we are able to enjoy the liberties
we enjoy today. Always remember that!!!
There are no warriors. There are people who, due to different circumstances, see themselves in a war situation. It is not normal to shoot at and kill our fellowmen. Our minds do not adjust to violence. If we must do it - to preserve our lives - the mental cost may be smaller, but we will never go through battle without paying the price. Each one of us must decide whether this price is not too high, and whether our war is a just one…
~HAPPY EASTER AS and Family!!!!!.
AS, sorry to hear your readjustment isn’t very easy. It pains me to know your having trouble. I Thank You with all my heart for everything you have been doing the past few years. Everything you and your family have done for America isn’t forgotten. I appreciate you keeping us updated along the way. If talking to this counselor helps, Good. I am happy you are aware and are getting the help. Bless You Dear Soul. It is people like you who make America so GREAT!!
THANK YOU
Oh, dear, AS. I know how very vital to our nation your service was, and how very stressful it is to face the transition phase back to civilian life. What you endure now is more of the same love of country service that you gave on the war front, but that doesn’t make it easier to endure. And you family not only made intense sacrifices while you were gone, but also must make the transition with you now you are home.
But I thank God for your service, both then and now, both your’s and your wife’s. And I thank God for your safe return. And I pray God to see you both through this phase as well. May He give that counselor wisdom to help, too.
above all, may this Easter see both you and your family blessed above all expectations.
Hang in there and remember: America NEEDS our heroes, both those in uniform and their spouses and their kids, who are heroes in their own right.
BTW: your wife is right. Ignore the foul mouthed, anti-social scum like the one on the road. They haven’t a clue what an American is. Just infants playing at adulthood.
Dear American Soldier,
Sorry about the length of this post, but I don’t know if I’ve been getting through on the contact part of the site. Please let me know if you might be interested. Thanks (and glad to hear that seeing the other guys lifted your spirits).
Best,
Jon
My name is Jon Pieslak and I am a professor of music at The City College of New York in New York City (Harlem). I am working on an article that explores how music plays a role in the war in Iraq and came across your blog as I was doing my research. As part of my work, I am very interested in getting the opinions and perspectives of soldiers, and I was wondering if you might be interested in being a part of the article. Basically, I wanted to e-mail you a few questions about music and your time in Iraq—like, “Could you describe the roles of music, if any, in your life in Iraq” and questions like that. It wouldn’t take up too much of your time and I will respect your anonymity if you wish.
This article is for and represents one of the first scholarly studies of music and the Iraq war. I want to present the viewpoints of soldiers in an uncensored form and allow their voices to be heard without editorializing. I am fully aware that much of mainstream media distorts evidence and quotations for the sake of creating the most “shocking” stories, which will then attract the most attention and sell. Or, certain newspapers and TV news broadcasts have distinct political platforms they are trying to advance, which leads to one-sided reporting. The nice part of my project is that there is no ambition to earn money or express pre-determined political views through this scholarship. Academic journals don’t make much money, if any at all, and as a result, they are not looking to profit off of this project and I am not getting paid. My “payment” is that I have the opportunity to have this project published; I make no money from this in any form. It would be great to have you as part of this article, so please let me know if you might be interested.
Even if you are not, I would like to thank you for your service and wish you a safe and healthy future.
Best wishes,
Jon
Hey AS,
I just want to share my thoughts with you.
I’m a 15 year old Dutch guy, so please, don’t mind any spelling errors.
First off; here in Holland, people are fully aware of what’s happening in Iraq. Not because of the media, but because of common sense.
We do think that there are firefights over there every day, and that the region is everything but safe.
We also believe that the images from Baghdad are just a big show. Those things are set up to have camera’s take pictures of them saying how great it is in Iraq.
We really DO have respect for the soldiers over there.
In our college, we have History-lessons from a woman that is very narrow-minded.
When we talked with her about this subject, she was just raging about how bad it was that you guys we’re “killing civilians”.
I just exploded.
Having followed your blog for quite a time now, and having lots of friends in the militairy (some of them are currently in Uruzgan, Afghanistan), i think i’ve got a fair impression of a soldier’s life.
I told my teacher about what you were doing over there, like escorting children, helping people out etc.
I ended with a sentence you might like;
“I don’t think that the war in Iraq is just, but those soldiers are! And what they are doing over there is far beyond our imagination! So don’t you dare call the soldiers over there killers!”
In Holland, there have been a lot of polls, and each of them point out that only 21% thinks the war is just, but 97% really cares for the soldiers, and 94% thinks they are doing a great job at helping the Iraqi’s recover.
So, there you have it.
94% of a nation stands with you.
94% of the 17 million people here cares for you, feels with you, and hopes that you will fully recover from your injuries.
You did more than you could, and you did a great job!
You are a hero!
Kind regards,
Max van Nugteren
First off, Happy Easter, AS, to you and yours!
As far as the your adjustment goes ; I had a Marine friend deployed, and out of worry, I read several articles and listened to some audio tapes about what PTSD was and how to tell and what could be done about it. No expert in ANY way at all, just concerned.
The thing that struck me as one of the most useful written, by a Psychologist who worked with the rescue workers the 9/11 attack, was that people ‘in service’,whether it be police, firemen, or soldiers especially don’t like to feel helpless, (no kidding, huh?) so bringing them onboard as active in their own recovery by giving them a clearcut understanding of exactly what PTSD is, and then the tools to help themselves, was a critical factor. The earlier the better.
The other critical factor was sharing with those who KNOW, which you’ve already been doing. Sounds like you are moving in a positive direction. I know you have tons of support, at home, and out here, too and I hope this is something that lingers but a short while on your radar. Whatever aids you, you are wished.
With great respect,
Good for you, AS. I’m glad you got to see your brothers and also that you are going to someone for help. We are out here for you as well–pulling for you, loving you, praying for you (and your lady). Happy Easter to you and your family. I hope it is a day filled with peace and all that brings you real joy.
Happy Easter AS and Family!!
Hope you feel better real soon! Prayers for you and your family!!
HAPPY EASTER, Y’ALL!!!
Easter: the eternal reminder that there IS hope!
May you have an awesome and blessed day.
*hugs* to all.
Dude;
You are not nuts. Greg and felt exactly the same when we returned from Vietnam in 1970. We have a new website at www.constructiveanarchy.com/blog. Scroll halfway down the page to WE REALLY SUPPORT OUR TROOPS AND VETS. Dwight (Gulf War I era vet) is the editor of this section and he would love to hear from you.
Can we post some of your stuff and link to you?
Magic Sam
Last Christmas I was shopping at WalMart when I ‘not quite’ brushed by a American Soliders shoulder. It was impossible not to notice the response….he so quickly looked at me to see who was near him and his look was very hard and stearn. I cannot imagine what you go thru returning to ‘public’ life but I do know that in that ‘instant’ I recognized how this person had allowed himself to be so trained………and did it for America and it’s people. I am so in awe of what all of you do, the training you go thru and the situations you have to face and deal with. Words could never express how I and so many feel about our Soldiers..I hope it helps in some way to know how thankful and proud we are of all you do. Please remember that while you take care of yourself via counseling, etc to return to the life-style you fought for we stand with you.
Thank you to you and your family
Ruth
Dear AS
Just saw an article in this Sunday’s Parade Magazine that might be of interest to you and yours. It is titled, “When Our Troops Come Home” by Dr Joyce Brothers……….
Take Care
Ruth
AS, you and Mrs. AS remain in my thoughts. I can’t know what you’re going through but my prayers are for you to find peace in whatever ways work best for you. I hope your counselor can help in that regard.
Always remember that you are not alone with these symptoms and problems. Most VA Hospitals have Group Therapy that can be a big help. And from personal experience don’t fall into the booze trap. That just adds to all your other problems. Thank you for answering the call and defending our freedoms. I hope you are soon healed both body and spirit. All the best to you and your family. And let us know when your book is published!
Just stopping in to offer long overdue condolences for your most recent injury and best wishes for a full recovery. Happy Easter/spring (whichever you prefer) and I wish you (much) good luck, in all aspects of your life.
Thank you,
Liz
Transition back can be tough judging from what I’ve heard. Since I’ve never experienced it, I can’t say “been there- done that”, but I can say you’re a smart cookie to recognize it and seek assistance.
Good luck, AS. Keep writing…
Totally normal reactions to all the abnormal experiences and environments.
It’s good to get together with the guys/gals with whom you survived your tour. I get together with any of mine who get in the neighborhood; just add alcohol and watch my wife’s eyes get bigger as she hears the stories I haven’t told her.
She particularly enjoyed hearing stories of how our unit “went rogue.” Picturing her husband as a “rogue” anything amuses her to no end.
Good for you AS. I admire anyone but especially a guy and a soldier to boot who has the strength of character to help himself even if he meeds outside help. You are taking charge of your own life and health and you are setting a great example for other troops in your situation who either don’t know what to do or are afraid of “how it will look!”
You were over six feet tall before, you just grew another six inches, lol. You’re going to be OK. Thank you for all you and your family have sacrificed for me and our country. Just remember we are all behind you and love you.
Dear AS,
As a fellow combat vet (Gulf War I) I hear you loud and clear! In my case, I had to get used to the darn FRENCH FRY ALARM at McDonald’s. It sounded like the freakin missile warning in my B-52! My PTS was a bit mild because I saw less carnage, but we killed a lot of people and that was heavy. In my case, our Chaplain made the difference. He connected me with the grace of God so that I could see His love healing what I saw and did. Ten years later I became a Chaplain myself. Almost all of us are trained in Critical Incident Stress Management and PTS intervention. Last fall I had a privilege of counseling a guy who was a gunner for several convoys and saw a lot of bad stuff, but he got it off his chest and found the grace to let go of a lot of his pent-up anger. His walk with God made the difference. It’s good that you are sharing your story with brothers in arms. The more you tell your story, the less power your story will have over you. It will be a part of you but will cease to define who you are. You are a good soul and I know you’ll work it out. God’s love for you is HUGE!
Blessings,
Fr. Wes
I was trien to figure out how i could find a friend that is over there i really would like to talk to him.